Description
For the past few days, I have felt as if my whole body had aged overnight. I ached and was sore, felt grumpy and tired. As I tuned in to the all over sense, I felt that the foundations of my being were shifting. It was a dull awareness, far away, in another realm, and I did nothing with it. I didn’t even think about it much.
I did think about my left hip though. It has been painful all year, and was was shouting particularly loudly now.
Wednesday morning I woke in quite a bit of pain. I opened up a newsletter that had just arrived from Jenny Schiltz of jennyshiltz.com who’s writing and work I admire.
In this newsletter, she wrote beautifully about the recent death of her mother and hips being the foundation. As I read, I could feel the resonance. Unprocessed grief low in my belly, tugging at the left hip. A bit later, walking the dog, I needed to sit on a bench to rest my hip. I dropped into meditation and immediately was engulfed by the insecurity I experienced in relation to my mother. She was an alcoholic, and not safe. I didn’t feel held by a safe pair of hands as an infant.
I could feel, as I sat in a beautiful park, this shifting of foundations. I was powerfully aware of grief and confusion. The foundational field I created in this life, one of insecurity and I’m not safe, was arranged around me, a holding field, a template for a life’s experience. It was thin, like an eggshell, and trembling, as if ready to crack open.
The regular Wednesday morning meeting, facilitated by Morgan Lee, was starting soon. I knew that it would be the perfect place to go deeper with all of this.
During that session, I met with my mother. She left the body back in 1996, but here, she showed up in Higher Self form. We were at a table looking over the blueprints for the lives we designed together. She looked me in the eye and said,
“Be the one that designed the life, not the one feeling trapped within it.”
In that simple, profound experience that lasted all of 2 seconds, was so much awareness. We had set up the circumstances, and the roles. They are just roles. My deep anger and hurt as a child served to disconnect me from all of the higher dimensional support. That support has always been there, and now is the time to reunite.
We create a life field, a foundation that holds all of the experience we have, or believe we have. Over vast stretches of time and many different incarnations experiences, this forms a structure of separation that we end up spending a huge amount of time, energy and money to “heal.” Nothing wrong with that at all. Those structures bind us tight, so all of the effort and focus on becoming whole is useful in bringing us to a state of readiness.
I think we are ready. I think collectively we are at a point where there is a mighty shift possible, individually and collectively. Perhaps now it is possible to crack open the foundational field we have created, the field that reflects back to us our limitations and wounds. Perhaps now it is possible to emerge from within those old foundational patterns into the much vaster field of the Greater Self. We are already and always held within that field. we have never gone anywhere. We have simply been deeply convinced by the identities and roles we have worn.
We are at a point where we are ready to shift our foundations from woundedness and limitation to Eternity. From deep engagement with lower self to being held in the embrace of Greater Self.
This is not the waving of a magic wand, making everything wonderful again. We are all at various stages of evolution. Healing work will continue. But there are stages we move through collectively and this is one of those points. It is the birth of a new template of possibility on the planet. It’s always been possible to live this way, it has always been demonstrated for us by teachers and masers. But I think we are seeing the cracking of our collective egg that has held us until we reach a point of readiness to emerge. That is by no means and end point. Just the birth into a new phase.
The Big Waves of Solstice, on 21st June, will a significant collective point of this process. We are going to explore it a little before then, set the scene, lay the groundwork.
